Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Tuesday, October 30, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes - Irish Coffee

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
Alex Levine

Halloween Jokes
Song Quotes
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Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Monday, October 29, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes - Chemistry

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be
why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

David Bissonette

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Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Thursday, October 25, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes - Pronunciations

Screwy pronunciations can mess up your mind!

For example...If you have a rough cough, climbing can be tough when
going through the bough on a tree!

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant
nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren't invented in England.

We take English for granted.

But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?

Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a
wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house
can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

If Dad is Pop, how's come Mom isn't Mop?

AUTHOR UNKNOWN or is it KNOTKNOWN?

Cute Quotes
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Halloween Jokes

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Wednesday, October 24, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes - Fiction

The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.

Tom Clancy


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Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Tuesday, October 23, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes - Humble

To a visiting diplomat:

"Don't be so humble - you are not that great."

Golda Meir 1898-1978

Literary Quotes
Literary Quotes
Veteran Quotes

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Monday, October 22, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes - Improve

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to
improve the world."

Anne Frank: (1929-1945) German-Dutch diarist

Famous Motivational Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Love Sayings

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Friday, October 19, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes

They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake.

Alexander Pope

Love Quotes and Sayings
Love Quotes
Blog Awards

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Thursday, October 18, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Existence

"By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss
and work twelve hours a day."
Robert Frost

Love Quotes and Sayings
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Cat Quotes
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Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Wednesday, October 17, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Famous Funny Quotes

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Mel Brooks

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Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Tuesday, October 16, 2007

 

Manuscript

“Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not
original and the part that is original is not good."

Samuel Johnson


Famous Motivational Quotes
Love Sayings
Motivational Quotations

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Monday, October 15, 2007

 

Joan of Arc

"One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought
Joan of Arc was Noah's wife...."

Robert Boynton

Famous Quotes
Christmas Quotes

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Friday, October 12, 2007

 

Fools

"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with
his fools."

Ernest Hemingway

Love Quotes and Sayings
Famous Quotes

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Thursday, October 11, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Existence

"The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of
ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us."

Quentin Crisp

Inspirational Quotes
Inspirational Quotations

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Wednesday, October 10, 2007

 

Florida

Florida wants to change the state's motto to attract younger people.
They're thinking about: "More than just a great place to die."

Joan Rivers

Inspirational Quotes
Inspirational Quotations
Christmas Quotes

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Tuesday, October 09, 2007

 

Diplomat

"A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers
her age."

Robert Frost

Quotes
Quotations

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Monday, October 08, 2007

 

Weather forecast

“Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely
scattered light by morning.”

George Carlin


Inspirational Quotations
Quotes
Quote Of The Day

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Friday, October 05, 2007

 

Liberal

"A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel."

Robert Frost

Sayings
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Quote Of The Day
Christmas Quotes

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Thursday, October 04, 2007

 

Bad manners

"Your bad manners only excel your bad manners."

Oscar Wilde


Christmas Quotes
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Yearbook Quotes
Quotes
Quotations
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Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Wednesday, October 03, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Why?

“Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that
never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time
for all that.”

George Carlin

Christmas Quotes
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Inspirational Quotations

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Tuesday, October 02, 2007

 

Old

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon; Then it's time for my
nap.

Bob Hope

Veteran's Day Quotes
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Yearbook Quotes
Quotes
Quotations

Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes - Monday, October 01, 2007

 

Funny Quotes - Water

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

WC. Fields

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