tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-271589242009-07-30T18:51:11.526-07:00Quotes which are funny and quotes which are famousBill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.netBlogger531125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-2135405150162146072009-07-30T18:48:00.000-07:002009-07-30T18:51:11.537-07:00A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?" <p> "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." </p><p> The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. </p><p> When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer. </p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-213540515016214607?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-76500268293320179652009-07-03T11:05:00.000-07:002009-07-03T11:06:04.642-07:00<h1 style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">4th of July Jokes</h1> <div style="text-align: center;"><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><a href="http://jokesfunny.wordpress.com/">Funny Jokes</a> - <a href="http://quotes-funny.blogspot.com/2008/06/fourth-of-july-quotes.html">4th of July Jokes</a></span><br /><br /><br />How is a healthy person like the United States?<br />They both have good constitutions!<br /><br />What quacks, has webbed feet, and betrays his country?<br />Beneduck Arnold!<br /><br />What's big, cracked, and carries your luggage?<br />The Liberty Bellhop!<br /><br />What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?<br />Liberty!<br /><br />What was General Washington's favorite tree?<br />The infantry!<br /><br />What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773?<br />The Boston Flea Party!<br /><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><a href="http://www.evliving.com/2008/06/28/737/fourth-of-july/">4th of July Quotes</a></span><br /><br />What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?<br />The Americans licked the British!<br /><br /><br />What ghost haunted King George III?<br />The spirit of '76!<br /><br />Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army?<br />He was a Yankee doodler!<br /><br />Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?<br />Because the horse was too heavy to carry!<br /><br />What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?<br />Yankee Poodle!<br /><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><a href="http://home.att.net/%7Equotations/fourthofjuly.html">4th of July Quotes</a></span><br /><br />Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?<br />Yeah, it cracked me up!<br /><br />What did one flag say to the other flag?<br />Nothing. It just waved!<br /><br />What dance was very popular in 1776?<br />Indepen-dance!<br /><br />What march would you play at a jungle parade?<br />"Tarzan Stripes Forever"!<br /><br />Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?<br />Because they're both cracked!<br /><br />What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?<br />The Battle of Bonkers Hill.<br /><br /></div> <h1 style="text-align: center;"><a bitly="BITLY_PROCESSED" title="Fourth of July Recipes" href="http://www.worldfamousrecipes.com/2008/01/22/frank-perdues-fourth-of-july-menu/">Fourth of July Recipes</a></h1><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-7650026829332017965?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-60024892658432010662009-06-08T05:42:00.000-07:002009-06-08T05:42:02.522-07:00Take time to laugh - it is the music of the soul.<br /><br />>From an old English prayer.<br /><br /><a title="Bill Austin" target="_blank" href="http://twitter.com/wbaustin">Bill Austin</a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-6002489265843201066?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-44060228597533254272009-06-07T05:38:00.000-07:002009-06-07T05:38:01.024-07:00Funny Quotes - Funny Love Quotes<br /><br />Love is a state in which a man sees things most decidedly as they are <br />not.<br />- Friedrich Nietzsche<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4406022859753325427?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-39529587217797149812009-06-06T05:37:00.000-07:002009-06-06T05:37:00.724-07:00Funny Quotes - Funny Love Quotes<br /><br />Love is a serious mental disease.<br />- Plato<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-3952958721779714981?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-32428577816561321132009-06-04T11:39:00.000-07:002009-06-04T11:41:38.174-07:00Funny Quotes - Funny Love Quotes<br /><br />Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.<br />- Robert Frost<br /><br /><a title="Bill Austin" target="_blank" href="http://twitter.com/wbaustin">Bill Austin</a><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-3242857781656132113?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-53464924881796349132009-05-08T14:17:00.000-07:002009-05-08T14:25:32.627-07:00<h1 style="text-align: center;">Mother's Day Quotes</h1><br />Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've<br />had a baby ... somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "Normal," is<br />history.<br /><br />Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct. somebody never took<br />a three-year-old shopping.<br /><br />Somebody said being a mother is boring ... somebody never rode in a car<br />driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.<br /><br />Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will "turn out good"...<br />somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.<br /><br />Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices. somebody never came<br />out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the<br />neighbor's kitchen window.<br /><br />Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother. Somebody never<br />helped a fourth grader with his math.<br /><br />Somebody said you can't love the fifth child as much as you love the first..<br />somebody doesn't have five children.<br /><br />Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing<br />questions in the books ... somebody never had a child stuff beans up his<br />nose or in his ears.<br /><br />Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery.<br />somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of<br />kindergarten. or on a plane headed for military "boot camp."<br /><br />Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied<br />behind her back. somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell<br />cookies.<br /><br />Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married.<br />somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a<br />mother's heartstrings.<br /><br /><br />Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home...<br />somebody never had grandchildren.<br /><br />Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell<br />her.... somebody isn't a mother.<br /><br /><a title="Mother's Day Jokes" href="http://www.morefunnyjokes.com/2009/05/08/mothers-day-jokes/">Mother's Day Jokes</a><br /><br /><br /><p>Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life.</p> <p><a title="Mother's Day Quotes" href="http://quotes.wordpress.com/2009/05/06/mothers-day-quotes/">Mother's Day Quotes</a><br /></p> <p>Mother's are a rose in the garden of life</p> <p><br /></p><p>My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.</p> <p>"I brought you into this world and I can take you out."</p> <p><a title="Mother's Day Jokes" href="http://jokesfunny.wordpress.com/2009/05/07/mothers-day-jokes/">Mother's Day Jokes</a></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-5346492488179634913?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-45265010689142030602009-05-06T21:57:00.000-07:002009-05-06T21:59:07.107-07:00<h1>Mother's Day Quotes</h1><br /><h2>Quotes for Mother's Day</h2><br /><br />Mothers Day 2009 is Sunday May 10, 2009<br /><br />There never was a woman like her. She was gentle as a dove and brave as a lioness... The memory of my mother and her teachings were, after all, the only capital I had to start life with, and on that capital I have made my way.<br />- Andrew Jackson, U.S. President<br /><br />My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. <br />- Graycie Harmon<br /><br /><br />My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever saw. All I am I owe to my mother. I attribute all my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her.<br />- George Washington, U.S. President<br /><br />When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child. <br />- Sophia Loren, Women and Beauty<br /><br />Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. <br />- Aristotle<br /><br /><a title="Mother's Day Quotes" href="http://www.evliving.com/2009/05/06/6244/mothers-day-quotes/">Mother's Day Quotes</a><br /><br /><br /><br />If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world would kick the beam. <br />- Lord Langdale (Henry Bickersteth)<br /><br /><br />It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. <br />- Phyllis Diller<br /><br />Women's Liberation is just a lot of foolishness. It's the men who are discriminated against. They can't bear children. And no one's likely to do anything about that. <br />- Golda Meir<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible. <br />- Marion C. Garretty, quoted in A Little Spoonful of Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul<br /><br /><br />Mother - that was the bank where we deposited all our hurts and worries. <br />- T. DeWitt Talmage<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. <br />- Irish Proverb<br /><br /><br />Motherhood is priced<br />Of God, at price no man may dare<br />To lessen or misunderstand.<br />- Helen Hunt Jackson<br /><br /><br />Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother. <br />- Oprah Winfrey<br /><br /><br />You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back. <br />- William D. Tammeus<br /><br /><br />Now that... my kids are grown, I understand how much work and love it takes to raise and to keep a family together. The example of your strength, devotion, and patience is now rippling through the generations. Thank you! <br />- Forest Houtenschil<br /><br /><br /><br />Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. <br />- Elizabeth Stone<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4526501068914203060?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-5999225280531736212009-05-06T21:52:00.000-07:002009-05-06T21:53:58.746-07:00Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.<br />- Spike Milligan<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-599922528053173621?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-43644700511558737132009-04-01T08:36:00.000-07:002009-04-01T08:37:12.345-07:00I think what's oppressive is anything outside the truth.<br />- Lauryn Hill<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4364470051155873713?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-34130329479600237412008-04-16T10:29:00.001-07:002008-04-16T10:32:22.594-07:00Leadership is solving problems. The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have stopped leading them. They have either lost confidence that you can help or concluded you do not care. Either case is a failure of leadership.<br /><br />--Colin Powell<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-3413032947960023741?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bonnie @ AZhttphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08207289944411384493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-47493683955598172142008-04-09T09:58:00.001-07:002008-04-09T10:00:52.163-07:00When choosing between evils, I always like to take the one I've never tried before.<br /><br />Mae West:<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4749368395559817214?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bonnie @ AZhttphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08207289944411384493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-83442066423968351472008-04-04T13:34:00.000-07:002008-04-04T13:37:25.661-07:00Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first.<br /><br />~ Billy Sunday<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-8344206642396835147?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bonnie @ AZhttphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08207289944411384493noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-40727648854065401192008-04-03T13:46:00.001-07:002008-04-03T13:46:05.781-07:00<h1>Peace Quotes</h1><h2>Quotes about Peace</h2><p>Peace can only last where human rights are respected, and where individuals and nations are free. </p> - Dalai Lama <br><br><br><br><a href=http://drinkrecipes.wordpress.com/>Drink Recipes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4072764885406540119?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-40587139527686076722008-04-03T10:31:00.001-07:002008-04-03T10:31:07.721-07:00<h1>Life Quotes</h1><h2>Quotes About Life</h2><p>Life is but a connection of short lasting good moments tied together by long lasting misery.</p><p> - Wietse Wiels </p><br><br><br><br><a href=http://lifequotes.wordpress.com/2007/02/11/heroes-quotes-hero-quotes/>Life Quotes</a><br><a href=http://jokesblog.wordpress.com/2007/09/07/fruit-cartoon/>Fruit Jokes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4058713952768607672?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-48676759534123215342008-04-03T10:23:00.001-07:002008-04-03T10:23:14.828-07:00Let nothing disturb thee; Let nothing dismay thee; All things pass; God never changes. Patience attains All that it strives for; He who has God Finds he lacks nothing;<p>- Unknown<br><br><br><br><a href=http://www.worldfamousrecipes.com/potato-recipes.html>Potatoes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4867675953412321534?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-11182770807257231242008-04-03T08:40:00.001-07:002008-04-03T08:40:20.801-07:00The absent are never without fault. Nor the present without excuse.<p>- Benjamin Franklin<br><br><br><br><a href=http://www.worldfamousrecipes.org/dessert-recipes/>Dessert Recipes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-1118277080725723124?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-71523045854684372942008-04-03T07:29:00.001-07:002008-04-03T07:29:28.245-07:00<h1>Science Quotes</h1><h2>Quotes About Science</h2><p>There is not the slightest indication that nuclear energy will ever be obtainable. It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at will. </p> - Albert Einstein, 1932 <br><br><br><br><a href=http://groups.msn.com/famousquotes/>Famous Quotes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-7152304585468437294?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-38311242276381546772008-04-03T00:13:00.000-07:002008-04-03T12:13:19.112-07:00<h1>Education Quotes</h1><h2>Quotes About Education</h2><p>Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. </p> - Chinese proverb <br><br><br><br><a href=http://chickenrecipes.wordpress.com/>Chicken Recipes</a><br><a href=http://quotesblog.wordpress.com/2007/06/12/john-adams-1735-1826-us-president/>John Adams Quotes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-3831124227638154677?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-76379890592255908752008-03-31T22:15:00.001-07:002008-03-31T22:15:38.722-07:00Culture is the art of being<br> - Mahendra Palsule<br><br><br><br><a href=http://www.quotes-world.com/>Famous Quotes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-7637989059225590875?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-80072917317975081552008-03-31T20:53:00.001-07:002008-03-31T20:53:22.972-07:00<h1>Peace Quotes</h1><h2>Quotes about Peace</h2><p>The structure of world peace cannot be the work of one man or one party or one nation. It must be a peace which rests on the cooperative effort of the whole world. </p> - Franklin Delano Roosevelt <br><br><br><br><a href=http://h.webring.com/hub?ring=fquotes>Famous Quotes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-8007291731797508155?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-44505214083737571392008-03-31T20:20:00.001-07:002008-03-31T20:20:44.769-07:00In the last analysis, ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity. <br><br>The Devil's Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce <br><br><br><br><a href=http://chickenrecipes.wordpress.com/2008/03/31/chicken-recipes-spring-chicken-edition-of-the-carnival-of-the-recipes/>Spring Chicken Recipes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-4450521408373757139?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-35668822854963111902008-03-31T19:19:00.001-07:002008-03-31T19:19:45.980-07:00<p>I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it. </p> - Jack Handey <br><br><br><br><a href=http://diabeticrecipes.blogspot.com/>Diabetic Recipes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-3566882285496311190?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-55318369188062914852008-03-31T17:37:00.001-07:002008-03-31T17:37:17.526-07:00<h1>Science Quotes</h1><h2>Quotes About Science</h2><p>It doesn't matter how beautiful your theory is, it doesn't matter how smart you are. If it doesn't agree with experiment, it's wrong </p> - Richard Feynman <br><br><br><br><a href=http://www.worldfamousrecipes.org/diabetic-recipes/>Diabetic Beef Recipes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-5531836918806291485?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27158924.post-25209198292364743412008-03-31T15:54:00.001-07:002008-03-31T15:54:59.836-07:00Do not despair, not even over the fact that you don't despair<br>Famous Quotes - Kafka<br><br><br><br><a href=http://www.worldfamousrecipes.org/diabetic-recipes/>Diabetic Beef Recipes</a><br><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/27158924-2520919829236474341?l=www.quotes-world.com'/></div>Bill Austinwbaustin@worldnet.att.net0